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Drowning in Home Management, Part Three
By Kendra | April 17, 2009
So what does it look like to actually live out your top five “Rock List” activities each day? Obviously, it will look different in your home than it does in mine, and that’s the way it should be. I’ll share how our day looks, but please don’t use it as a measuring stick. You and your family are unique!
1. Nurture, guard, protect, and grow my relationship with the Lord
I’ve been using a wonderful tool to help me read through the entire Bible this year. Typically, I’ll read the day’s Psalm at the breakfast table, then read the rest when I get a quiet moment- during quiet hour or before bed.
Worshiping, singing Scripture with the kids, praying throughout the day with my family and by myself are the ways in which I nurture my relationship with the Lord.
2. Nurture, guard, protect, and grow my relationship with my husband
This one is tricky, because if you gauge its importance by the actual amount of time we spend together, it would seem to fall to the bottom of the pile. We’re in the thick of raising children; the time spent doing all of the things that entails is just the reality of it all. We enjoy our children, and they have made our marriage stronger.
I am so thankful for email and the internet, if only to be able to pop notes back and forth to each other all day long. Because my husband has patients and appointments, I don’t like to call him at work. But I can shoot off an email and some days it feels as if we’ve had a daylong conversation.
Our expectations for ourselves are different, too. When we were giddy college students we had exciting and romantic dates. Now, a trip by ourselves to Costco makes me really happy 
3. Clothe our family
10 people. Lots of clothes. Twice a year I’m searching the end-of-season clearance sales (mostly online), twice a year I’m pulling out and putting away last season’s clothes, and all year long I’m laundering, folding, ironing, mending, and passing it on.
If I’m smart, I can do the thing I love (knitting) and make clothes for my family. This assures that knitting has a place on my Top Five.
4. Feed our family and keep our home sanitary (I realize these are really two things here, but they’re both housekeeping related)
Planning, couponing, shopping, cooking, cleaning it up. Decluttering, tackling a room at a time for deep cleaning, keeping the bathrooms and the kitchen clean. I do have housekeepers who bail me out, but when I didn’t I devoted a half day a week to cleaning the house- usually Friday afternoons.
5. Educate our children
Planning and executing everyone’s education. This is the bulk of my day, but perhaps when there are no little people anymore we’ll be able to get all our schoolwork done by noon or so. For now we have to spread things out in order to accomodate the needs of teenagers, babies, and everyone in between.
If you have come to this series late, be sure to read Part One and Part Two. The comments on both posts are rich with discussion and encouragement.
Topics: Home Organization, Nurturing Moms | 15 Comments »
April 17th, 2009 at 2:16 am
Thank you Kendra! I read your blog regularly, but have only just managed to find the time to log on and see what you’ve posted. I’ve just read the 3 posts in this series and they have certainly hit a chord with me! It comes at the perfect time as I am currently working on our household management plan and kids routines. I thank God for the effort you make in sharing your wisdom! Thank you, thank you!!!
April 17th, 2009 at 4:47 am
I’ve taken some time and, after working with your list some and making changes, I’ve blogged the basics of my Rock List over at my blog… http://babychaser.blogspot.com/2009/04/my-working-copy.html.
Thanks for all your wisdom! I’m excited to get started!
April 17th, 2009 at 5:55 am
So I still haven’t written my top 5…haven’t found (made) the time I guess. I think mine is along the lines of yours…or at least my dream top 5 looks a lot like yours. #1. We are trying to read the Bible in a year. Some days it gets skipped due to crazy schedules but I think I might at least read a Psalm…it’ll be something at least. #2…the husband, thing…thank God for texting! #3…Yes! Clothes! I have 7 kiddos, a husband, and a mom who lives with us. None of which buy clothes for themselves. So…I, too, hit the clearance sales (found great deals when our local consignment shop goes 1/2 price after season!). Does it hurt your brain like it hurts mine trying to guess ahead about who will wear what size the following year? I make a list of sizes and keep it with me. I get a few wrong here and there but for the most part it helps. #4…coupons, sales, and rebates, oh my! #5…Yes! Schooling! We currently homeschool through a Christian school using the ACE curriculum but with 5 schooling next year it will be very expensive. Since hubby’s church position will not be paying him after May we really have to cut corners so I’m trying to find all the used ACE curriculum I can since we love the program. Anyone know of any used curriculum aside from ebay? Anyway…why I just told you all this I have no idea…to vent maybe? All in all…I totally relate and am so thankful to have folks that feel the same way! Hugs to you!
April 17th, 2009 at 6:18 am
Thank you for saying that your children have made your marriage stronger. Too often we hear the opposite from the world. That is an encouragement to me.
April 17th, 2009 at 8:16 am
“Now, a trip by ourselves to Costco makes me really happy
”
Boy, howdy, can I relate to that one!!
You’re a smart girl to work something you love (knitting) into your five non-negotiables!
April 17th, 2009 at 8:21 am
Carmen — a great place to find used homeschool stuff is homeschoolclassifieds.com. I’ve had great luck there.
Kendra — Thank you for this series! I worked very hard and diligently to declutter and make a place for everything — everything — last year (it took months); I couldn’t tidy the house because so many things didn’t have places to go, so they just migrated from one surface to another. Now, I’ve got to actually work my maintenance plan. Too bad lists don’t equal work done.
.
April 17th, 2009 at 10:53 am
Love this. Thank you Kendra. For me, I am costantly evaluating what is a “rock” and what is “sand.” And honestly, if a do properly tend to my rocks, there is not a whole lot of room left in my jar. And that’s OK! Its satisfying knowing that my time is spent on the important.
April 17th, 2009 at 5:12 pm
Hi Kendra. Great post(s).
I’ve just sorted through my boys’ (5 of them) clothes for winter. I’ve still got to do my girls (only 2 of them). I still need to buy the odd things they need but I have the list on my Palm. Also on my Palm I have a list of each child’s measurements. Probably the most important measurement is the inside leg measurement. I always carry a retractable tape measure in my handbag (purse). That way, if I see a great deal, I can be sure that the pants I buy will be the right size for each child.
Shawna B – I remember reading something else you wrote (can’t remember exactly what it was!). I love your attitude – “it is satisfying knowing that my time is spent on the important.”
In Him
Meredith
April 17th, 2009 at 6:21 pm
This has been such a helpful series. Thank you for sharing your hard-earned wisdom!
April 17th, 2009 at 6:47 pm
Kendra,
Thank you for this series. I have been reading all the comments and have been blessed. My five are
Time with God
Clean house per hubby doesn’t like a mess
Preparing food
Laundry
Reading to the kids (2,4,6, and
Your list was a huge blessing to me as it made me think that time does not always equal relationship. Since my first kid I have struggled to be faithful in my quiet time. I am usually good until I get pregnant at which time I am sick and tired, get back on track and then in the newborn stage I get back off track – which is discouraging! I am now 9 weeks with #5, hubby is deployed for a month, we are moving in less than 3 months and the 130 year old house we bought sight unseen (we were overseas) still has tons of work that needs to be done before we rent it out. I feel like a sick sloth, but I am grateful that even though I cannot do all I could pre pregnancy I can still have a relationship with my Heavenly Father. It hit me that relationships change at stages of life. I started listening to the Bible on tape while I painted a room and even while I laid down for a few moments in the afternoon. I am so thankful that God knows our frame.
I really thank you too for your advice to eat protein. I have always been pretty sick with pregnancies till between 14 and 21 weeks and even though it was very difficult to eat protein I really did feel a ton better. I still don’t feel great, but thank the Lord I don’t feel nearly as bad as I have in the past.
Just a hint – never in a million years move north where all eight kids need snowsuits, hats, gloves, scarves and boots. Keeping four kids in all that stuff has been my biggest challenge yet. Hello South Carolina – Bye bye Massachusetts!
April 17th, 2009 at 6:51 pm
Hi Kendra. I’m a relatively new reader and have especially enjoyed this little series. I’m so glad you elaborated today. I can’t tell you how blessed I was. When you listed the things you do regarding your relationship with the Lord, I suddenly realized that I do all of those things — but because I don’t spend the two hours in quiet journaling and studying that I used to do, I always feel like I’m not doing enough. I’m going to remember this post and tell myself to stop feeling guilty and to just love the Lord!
I also appreciated what you wrote about your husband. Again, just that it’s OKAY to be parents together, working out this incredible calling… and not have tons of time for much else right now! That’s NOT the encouragement I often read elsewhere, and I was blessed and affirmed.
April 17th, 2009 at 11:55 pm
I really appreciate this series of posts, and it’s been good to see your list – mine is much the same, although I don’t homeschool (yet. I’m still deciding on that one and the oldest one is only 2 now, so I still have some time.
).
The problem is that I have only one child (am pregnant with no.2), yet there are days and weeks where even the 5 things on the list are daunting and I feel totally overwhelmed. I have an amazingly supportive husband, so no problem there. I guess there’s a certain expectation on a Christian woman to almost be this kind of superwoman – good wife, good mother, good housekeeper, good cook, creative, active in the church community, etc, etc.
How would you suggest freeing yourself from these ‘expectations’ when many of them are good things and even necessary? I find looking to God for strength certainly helps, but the problem doesn’t just disappear.
April 18th, 2009 at 12:07 am
Franci-
Very good question. I have to say that freeing myself from the expectations (or perceived expectations) of others has been a slow maturing process in me. Pray. Ask God to strengthen you and confirm what it is that He has for you. And ask Him to give you the ability to close your ears
~Kendra
June 1st, 2009 at 8:00 pm
Very awesome series, thank you!!! I’m still working on my list. It’s shaping up to be more of a “person” priority list, than a “task” priority list.
June 1st, 2009 at 8:02 pm
Purple Moose-
You have me intrigued. Will you share it when you’re finished?
~Kendra